Thursday, November 4, 2010

AWOL

That's what I'm gonna be this whole weekend!! I am leaving tonight and not coming back until Sunday (maybe)!

Ever since school started in August, I feel like I have been running myself ragged trying to do everything and be everything for everyone. And it feels like I'm chasing my own tail! I never really get anywhere and it's just never enough! The last month or so, I have had a few melt-downs. Sometimes it really gets to me that I can't do it all and especially that I can't be perfect in everything. (That's not so much to ask, is it?) I have just felt so very overwhelmed and being the mom has felt a lot more like work than I ever wanted it to. I love being the mom (for the most part) and I want it to be fun!

So, my solution is to get away for a while. I think when you remove yourself from the situation, it makes you realize how great you really have it. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, like that. (And hopefully it will make the husband and kiddos realize how great they have it, too!) I'm not going anywhere special... just home to my mom and dad. You know, the place where I feel safe and accepted. (Maybe it is somewhere special after all.) I am going to do some Christmas shopping, go to the temple, and visit with my Grandma. I cannot tell you how excited I am to have a break and just be Brenda for a few days!

But you know what? I have a sneaking suspicion that by Sunday I will be 100% ready to be the mom again! (OK, maybe 99%.)